Sunday, February 22, 2009

So I was looking through my old pictures today, and I came across this ancient artifact. Wow. I was only 18 years old and Deanna was just a few months old (and she looked like a chubby little martian). It was taken at De and Don's (her adoptive parents) house when they lived in Raleigh. I always loved visiting Deanna, but it was so difficult. Sometimes I wondered whether seeing her was better for me...or worse. I can't help thinking about how different a person I was when this picture was taken. I was an insecure 18-year-old college freshman attending a school that I hated. I had no close friends, I was depressed, I was far away from my family, and I had just given away a part of myself.
It's funny how things work out. De called me a few days ago to say, "Happy Anniversary!" I realized that it had been exactly 4 years ago on February 12, 2005 that we had met. I can't believe it has been that long. They are such great Christian parents, and I have learned so much about how I want to raise my own kids because of them. A while back, I jokingly told them that they should adopt a baby brother for Deanna. They laughed and said, "Well get started!" Very funny. :)
All jokes aside, I don't see how I could ever possibly create something more perfect than Deanna Marie. She is absolutely amazing. And I bet that she would probably torture a younger sibling in the same way that she tortures her 153 pound Great Dane, Hank. She bit his tail once and got a mouth full of fur. The day her parents brought her home from the hospital, they worried about how Hank would react to a new baby. They watched in amazement as Hank ran five circles around the large floor rug in Deanna's bedroom and settled snugly on a spot right below her crib, as if he was protecting her. Call me crazy, but I felt so much more at ease knowing that I had THREE amazing people--Don, De, and Hank (yeah, he's a person too)--to look after my little girl. It has never been easy, but it has always been worth it...


Kayli said...

Amy, your blog is amazing. Thank you for shining the light for the rest of us "new" birth mothers to follow. I placed my birth daughter in May, so it's still pretty fresh. Your blog is wonderful to me, I don't know how better to say it but thank you. I'd love to connect and ask you some questions...if you'd like to?

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