Since the beginning of Amstel Life in 2009, I've kept pretty mum on the details of my love life. For privacy reasons, I rarely blog about specific people, situations and circumstances involving my love life - until now. On this very rare occasion, now that I'm engaged (typing those words still brings a smile to my face), I want to introduce this very special person to my readers, share how we met and finally became engaged, and explain how he fits into our open adoption journey.
I met Aaron in March of 2009. I was living the single life and was out on the town enjoying a few cold ones with my best friend Angela Bell (or as Deanna says, "Angi-bell" because she has beautiful red hair like Ariel) at a local sports cafe in Raleigh (sports cafe just sounds so much classier than sports bar). I was a month and a half shy of graduating from NC State, and my life couldn't have been crazier. I was juggling two internships, leading two student organizations on campus, had just begun a part-time job visiting medical practices in the area, and was desperately trying to get all of my school work completed before the end of the semester. Okay, so back to the "sports cafe." Angela and I were there to watch Carolina Hurricanes hockey game, and in order to get a table faster we decided to combine groups with some people we didn't know. Angela and I quickly became friends with the people we randomly got seated with. I was glancing around the room when suddenly, I noticed a very attractive stranger, a few tables away, looking straight at me. Well, actually, he was doing more than looking. He was kind of staring. We met eyes a few times, and I quickly became self conscious. Did I have something on my face? I asked Angela and she gave me a funny look because I clearly didn't. I decided to head to the restroom to double check myself in the mirror anyway. As I was coming out of the bathroom, I spotted the same guy who had been staring at me. He was in the hallway right outside of the bathroom...walking towards me! This is my favorite part; he walked right up to me and used the old "You look really familiar...do I know you from somewhere?" line. I laughed, and we immediately hit it off. Aaron was witty, smart, athletic, attractive and outdoorsy. He asked if I had a boyfriend, and I told him that I did not. Apparently he thought that one of the guys sitting at my table was a boyfriend, so he had decided to approach me privately instead of walking up to my table, introducing himself to me, and risk starting a bar - I mean sports cafe - fight. This explains why he believed a bathroom ambush was the best course of action. I thought that was very noble of him.
Although he was a few years older than me, it turns out we actually had a lot in common. He was athletic (he was a sprinter on the track team at Georgia Tech when he was in college), had three younger sisters, and was a Christian. I was smitten. After a while, I realized that I should probably let my friend Angela know that I was fine and hadn't been abducted. So naturally, I sent her a quick text that may or may not have said something something along the lines of: "Met someone in the bathroom. Hot. 30." And Angela knew that I was fine.
Aaron and I talked for a while longer, and he asked for my phone number. A few days later, he called and asked me on a date. I told him I was too busy to even think about dating, but if he could wait a month until I graduated from college then I would gladly take him up on that offer. Well, he waited. It was the evening before I graduated from NC State, and Aaron and his friends met up with me and some of my friends. We hit it off again, and later that same week we finally went on our first date. Three years later, he asked my dad for permission to marry me. Keith gave his approval.
One of the many things I love about Aaron is that even though he's rough around the edges and is one of the manliest guys I know, he is one of the most loyal and kind hearted people I know. I have felt so comfortable and at ease around him since the minute I met him. It really feels like I have known him my whole life. A few weeks before we went on our first date, we became Facebook friends and he happened upon my blog. He sent me a little message to let me know that he thought the decision I made was admirable and he thought even more highly of me because of it. How rare for a guy to call my decision "admirable!" It was such a relief to know that Aaron wasn't going to be one of the many guys who ran in the opposite direction after learning about my past - and the four-year-old fruit of my loins.
Another reason I think Aaron and I bonded so quickly is because we have both experienced loss in our lives at about the same time. My loss was the result of me getting pregnant in high school and ultimately choosing open adoption, but Aaron's loss wasn't his choice. Unfortunately, his mother passed away from cancer in 2007 – before I had a chance to meet her. From what I’ve heard, she was an amazing, vibrant, Godly woman who deeply touched every person she knew. Fortunately, I've had the opportunity to watch a video of Myra speaking to their entire church on Mother's Day, and his three sisters, Jenny, Hannah and Anne, each have beautiful characteristics and personalities that give me glimpses of what she must have been like.
Over the past few years, Aaron has spent lots of time with me during visits with Don, De and Deanna. Recently, we took a trip down to South Carolina to visit our wedding venue for the first time, and we took that opportunity to spend some quality time with Don, De and Deanna (who recently turned 7!). We asked Deanna to be a flower girl in our wedding, and she then asked us if we could just get married "tomorrow" so she didn't have to wait until next year. We all laughed. So naturally, we decided to take her with us to our wedding cake tasting appointment. Turns out she is a pretty good decision maker. :) It's awesome to see Aaron and Deanna getting along so well, and of course Don and De love Aaron too.
It's so clear to me now that this is how things are supposed to be. If you had told me five or six years ago that I would be as happy as I am today, I would have never believed it. Never. I still remember the tears and the sadness and the depression and the guilt. I never thought in a million years that I would be able to overcome those things. But here I am today, a very real testament to the fact that with a little faith, anything is possible. It's amazing what God has done - and continues to do - in my life. Proverbs 3:5 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." I'm so thankful that even when I didn't understand why I had to go thought what I went through, God did. He used my lapses in judgement and turned them into tremendous blessings. After all of the heartbreak and discouragement and loss, it's encouraging to know that all along, God had a greater purpose and a better plan for my life. I'm still learning to trust Him everyday and walk by faith and not by sight, but I'm so thankful to have this amazing guy by my side to help me navigate through this crazy journey.
Photos compliments of Erin Dietrich Photography :)